Warriors Bloopers
by InterestingIndeed
Summary: This is what happens when to make a deadline I stay up super late writing stuff. Most of this is just my typos, venting, or just stuff I was thinking at the time. *WARNING: Contains swear words!*
1. Facepalm

These are actual things I have written either by accident or just being frustrated about my stories. Some of it is me venting. It works best if for each line you imagine a bleep or something in between them like they have in the bloopers in actual life. Oh and this is rated K+ but it includes swear words. Just a warning if that isn't your cup of tea. *Slurps Tea* Besides that, a lot of these include references from stuff I was thinking at the time I was writing so you may not get all of them. **These are all cats from my stories! You may not recognize the names! But you don't have to read my stories, just imagine cats for the names. It doesn't add to the humor value if you know what I am talking about. They are all just cats, m'kay? So no comments about not recognizing the cats.**

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><p>Destiny's Calling<p>

She looked up with weary eyes and said. "YABBA DABBA DUN WITH UR SHIT."

She didn't have the heart to tell Willowlight the reason she had been avoiding her was because she was being a jerk and didn't want to share her special spot beside Willowlight in the medicine cat den because, let face it, as kids no one liked sharing.

The drizzle turned into a dance-off before night fall.

Crestfall looked absolutely crestfallen.

"There hasn't been this much mayhem since StarClan held a Halloween."

"Look what I found!" Screeched the kit. She was holding up small white things. Maplesplash's first instinct? Cocaine. (No worries there actually mushrooms)

"ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!" Yowled Whitepaw. "I am tired of these mother fucking Rhea's on my motherfucking planes."

"WHAT NOW?" Yowled Winterstar. Redpaw stopped. "I just want to drink mah pumpkin spice latte in peace. I DID NOT want to be interrupted! M'kay sweetie? Kay,"

Sunpaw batted at a small lump of moss half heartedly.

"What do you have to say for yourself?" Willowlight encouraged.

"My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard," She whimpered in a mix between a squeak and whisper. "And dang right, it's better than yours."

"Oh no," Whispered Maplepaw into Whitepaw's ear. "They speak french,"

"I HAVE 99 PROBLEMS," Screeched Winterstar, "BUT A CLAN MEMBER AIN'T ONE."

Maplepaw tripped over Starkit on her way out. Look's like some cat forgot to clean up the kits that were strewn about.

"Cats of the clans," Winterstar bellowed over the confusion and noise. "I declare that we all do the Harlem Shake!" Then music started blaring from no where as all the cats started 'dancing.'

Maplepaw watched the pale warriors stroll past. She'd always wondered what StarClan looked like. Jayfeather swished his tail impatiently.

"We don't have much time," He meowed.

"Why?" Maplepaw asked innocently. "What will happen?"

"The fan girls will catch up to me," Jayfeather meowed tersely.

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><p>Jayfeather Wants Cake… At 4 in the morning<p>

Jayferther meowed, woah woah, jayferther? JAYFERTHER! OMG I LOVE YOU JAY FERTEHR. FUCK. THERE IS NOT ENOUGH SUGAR IN THE WORLD TO MAKE THIS OKAY.

"Your mom," Jayfeather meowed just as Squirellflight and Leafpool came into the den.

"I KNOW you weren't insulting me," Squirellflight said all sass and snaps.

I hope you enjoyed! If you haven't read any of my works you can go and check them out to get am idea of I was talking about or just exit this and call it a day. Either way thanks for reading!


	2. They see me Trolling

**Hey guys! I had great success posting my epic fails last time so here are more fails and sentences gone wrong!**

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><p>The Clan's Halloween<p>

Ivypool was forced by her sister to dress up and by forced we mean kidnapped and showed into batman costume.

"Oh yeah," Firestar meowed. He rubbed against his former mate, Sandstorm, who was dressed up as a piece of toast. "I could go for those buns."

If you will cry when we tell you Jayfeather dressed as one of the three blind mice you should probably leave.

If you will also cry if we told you he put it on backwards because being blind makes putting on clothes that much harder you should also leave.

"Dressing Lillykit up as a cup of coffee was a very bad idea in everyway." Concluded Bramblestar as he watched Lionheart convulse on the ground. "Is he doing the Harlem shake?"

Candy is the new crack, don't do candy kids.

Yellowfang had discovered the magic of the printer and the troll meme. She had taped it to her fur and was singing 'Trololololol' but her costume was infinitely better than Whitestorm. Apparently even in death he still had a sense of humor because he'd found a wagon. He rode on it through out the forest yelling at the top of his lungs, 'THEY SEE ME ROLLING, THEY HATING,'

"Good job Bluestar," Oakheart told his mate as he watched Mosskit go into a hyperglemic fit. "You killed our daughter, again."

A few warriors in WindClan went as rabbits. Some in ShadowClan went as lizards. You can probably guess what some RiverClan cats dressed up as: that's right, rocks.

"I got a vole!"

"I got some rabbit!"

"I got a lizard!"

"I got a fish."

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><p><strong>Quotes All Around<strong>

**All of these are actual quotes I put in stories but edited out because… well… you'll see.**

"Well dip me in shit and roll me in powdered sugar!"

"Oh look, a pair of blundering idiots in their natural habitat."

"Oh yeah? Well, at least my mentor has emotion!"

"He purred? Good, that means he is turning into Sasuke Uchiha"*

"Because this is real bullshit. I mean, shit to the actual bull."

"The only thing worse than that are the fan girls."

"MY EYES CANNOT UNSEE WHAT THEY JUST SAW"

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><p>*Sasuke Uchiha is a NarutoNaruto Shippuden character who is well known for emo personality. Yes, InterestingIndeed is a hard core fan of Naruto and secretly wishes she was a shinobi.

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><p>A few people said that they were thinking about doing this type of thing. Go for it! Just PM when you're done and I'll be sure to check it out!<p> 


	3. BURN LIKE THE THUNDERCLAN FOREST

Ever had Autocorrect botch a warrior name? Well here is my most frustrating attempts to write with AutoCorrect's name changing ways

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><p><strong>Squirrellflight<strong>

Squirrel flight

Flying squirrell

Squid

Flight of the squirrell

**Firestar**

Fire Star

Fireball

Fire par

Fire tar

**Sandstorm**

Sand storm

Sand

And storm

**Willowlight**

Willow Light

Pillow fight

Willow flight

**Sunpaw**

Sun Paw

Sun Pal

Sunset

Sun burn

**Bluefur**

Blue fur

Blue burr

Blue bear

Blue berry

**Cherrytail**

Cherry tail

Cherry tree

Hairy bee (?)

Cherry flail (More like FAIL! BURN LIKE THE THUNDERCLAN FOREST!)

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><p>In the process of trying to come up with your mama jokes Jayfeather and Lionblaze found these oldies but terrible.<p>

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><p>Yo mama's so fat when you kill her in Call of Duty it's a five kill streak<p>

Yo mama's so stupid that she thought that RiverClan LIVED UNDERWATER

Yo mama's so stupid she thought that the warrior cat's series was for third graders and she banned it from our house because she says that being in high school means making mature decisions and then she handed me a copy of Twilight... BUT I AIN'T GONNA MAKE THE TERRIBLE DECISION TO READ MOTHER FRIGGEN TWILIGHT GIMME MY WARRIORS!

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><p>If you have ever tried to work with someone playing something in the background you sometimes write that down instead of what you're supposed to write. For Example:<p>

Sunpaw responded "because you know I'm all about that bass, 'bout that bass, no treble."

Frostwing glanced over the edge of the cliff. "Drink, eat chew Orbit."

Maplepaw stopped him. "The immune system is a complex system, in fact they take an entire trimester in college to cover it alone but we have squeeze that all into one unit- MAREN CLOSE YOUR LAPTOP" - I was writing in Chemistry and I wrote this instead of my work.

"I'm sexy and I know it," Growled Jayfeather.


End file.
